My latest dream name assignment would be developing brand names for cannabis. And the cannabis industry has a naming problem now that it’s legit.

As a subculture, it was common practice to use existing product names as names of cannabis varieties and products. The thinking was that it was parody and therefore not a trademark violation. But in the newly-legalized marketplace, the owners of those trademarks are defending their trademarks. These include Gorilla Glue vs. sticky-budded Gorilla Glue #4; Tapatío Foods vs. cannabis-infused hot sauce, Trapatio; Honest Company vs. Honest Herbal; Toronto Maple Leafs vs. Snoop Dogg’s Leafs by Snoop; and Toys R Us vs. Buds R Us; Hershey vs. Hasheath; and Girl Scouts of America vs. cannabis-infused Girl Scout Cookies edibles. Star Wars is sure to have issues with Skywalker OG. And I doubt E. B. White’s estate is thrilled with the Charlotte’s Web product.

So, if you need a name for your cannabis product, I’m your man. We’ll develop a strategic and ownable name, even though you can’t officially have a U.S. trademark for cannabis. But that is another blog post.